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It is the people who keep going that are the ones I surpassed. The ones that stopped when things get hard, keep going.
Welcome to the Make Up Your Mind podcast. I'm your host Jahleane Dolne, and I'm here to help you make up your mind - literally and figuratively. I'm a motivational speaker, content creator, subconscious mindset coach, and the founder of The Postgrad Playbook- the only coaching platform and resource center for post-grads and 20 somethings to release mindset blocks and take action towards their chosen career , no matter how, quote unquote, unconventional that might look.
As an expert recognized by Afrotech, LinkedIn news,, and more, I help you identify what you actually want, release what's keeping you stuck, and have a game plan to take action with clarity, confidence, conviction, and ease. Here we cover all things, paving your own way and how that looks personally and professionally. Get ready to finally make up your mind.
Let's get started.
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Hi, welcome back to another episode of makeup, your mind. Happy Wednesday. I hope you've been having an amazing week. I know that I have. If you have been following me on Instagram, you've known that I was just at essence Fest. I was in new Orleans last week and had the absolute best time just immersing myself in that whole experience.
And I'm really excited to be diving into everything that I went through today.
I didn't know that I was going to be traveling to essence Fest until pretty close to before it happened. And I think I learned a lot of things throughout the whole experience, which I'm really excited to talk to you, whether it was about networking being spontaneous, and putting yourself in the right rooms for your career.
We're going to go through all of it today before we get into it, if you're on YouTube, hit the subscribe button.
If you are listening on apple podcasts or Spotify, make sure you're following. And also leave me a review on apple podcasts. I would love to see it and helps us information, reach [00:02:00] people that would need it the most.
So anyways, let's get into it. How I ended up at essence Fest.
So basically my friend was invited on a brand trip to go to essence fast and represent that brand that she's an ambassador of and last minute got access to a plus one. Which ended up being meat and this ended up falling into place so perfectly. I hadn't seen her in a hot minute, which was way too long and I was desperately in need of a vacation and to take a break from overworking myself.
So. We were in California, we packed our bags. We headed to new Orleans and over the next, like it was from the fourth to the eighth. We had the absolute best time. This is my very first essence Fest and I've been to conferences in the tech space. I've been at conferences in the media space. But there really is nothing that compares to essence Fest. To give you an overall visual of, I feel like it's almost hard to describe, but it is in a [00:03:00] huge venue. Huge huge, huge venue.
Just when you think the venues about it. And there are like two other sections that have all these activations where all these different brands are, right. McDonald's was there Ford was there, um, Coca-Cola was there.
Shea moisture is there all the beauty brands you can think of? L'Oreal they were all there and they all had these huge activations and they also had speakers coming in.
At one point, it was just so packed. It's actually crazy who they're able to pull for this event. At one point I saw Serena Williams speaking another point. I saw Sarah Jakes, Roberts speaking.
I saw Aaron Ray do a performance. We saw Keyshia Cole. We saw music, soul child. Lisa JT perform.
Basically everybody was there. And it was wild to see. One thing that I loved about essence Fest personally, is that you could really choose your own adventure.
They had so many different panels on so many different topics that you could really curate your own space. So it's not really specifically for one specific person. [00:04:00] It's for anybody. I really enjoyed a lot of the wellness panels that they had. So I went to an EFT tapping one. There was a meditation room.
I also popped in on the astrology lecture and I went to one on independent authors. It was a whole experience and a half of just being able to tap into other people's expertise. That was absolutely invaluable to me.
Also all these events don't even account for everything that happens at night, which is when they have their separate concert series. So they had Birdman, they had cash money. They had T pain, Ari Lennox. Usher Kiki Palmer, Victoria Monet. SWV, Janet Jackson. They had all the icons stepping out for this to put this into perspective, how big essence Fest is.
I've heard that it was more attended than Coachella.
And. It blew my mind and that blows my mind. It was more attended than Coachella. And one thing that I did love that while I was there is that [00:05:00] it's such a melting pot of culture there. You have people all different age range, you have gen Z to boomers, right? Everyone's talking to each other intermingling. And you have everyone who's in such different industries so that you can learn from each other and expose yourself to different ways of thought different perspectives, people from different parts of the country. People came from all over.
So such a blessing that my angel of a best friend was able to take me and that that whole experience got to be sponsored. And I could immerse myself into it in this way.
Like I mentioned, there were a lot of things that I learned from this whole experiences or some things I learned to the past that were brought to the forefront. Once again, through this experience. And that is for a lot of us that are listening to this. You probably fall into the category where you are a pivitor or you are a hustler. Are you trying to make something work for yourself and it is so, so, so, so, so important to put yourself in an environment where you have the opportunity to just have random chance encounters that can lead [00:06:00] to more opportunity or help you move forward in the pivot that you're hoping to make.
A lot of times, it's just about positioning yourself in the right rooms and the right places in order to increase your luck surface area.
I first learned this a couple of years ago when I went to my first agriculture con, I was so excited to go and it was just such a fun experience for me. And I was still working in tech at the time, but I really wanted to make the pivot into more media focused work. And I set the intention when I was going there that I was going to make some connections or I would just be open to whatever possibilities or opportunities would arise for me.
And then as soon as I walk in, I was standing in this long line and I start talking to the woman behind me.
It was the most harmless, small talk like, oh, what brought you to culture con. This line is super long. Are you from New York, yada, yada, yada. And we just continue the conversation until we're getting closer to the front of the line.
And she asked me what brought me to culture con and I'm asking her the same things. And then I find out she was an executive at Showtime, which then led to other [00:07:00] connections that I was extremely grateful for.
I was extremely grateful for it, but I also was heavily aware that if I had not put myself in the position to be able to meet her, that a lot of the pieces that ended up falling into place would never have happened.
So I love putting myself out there.
And I look priming myself to be ready for these kinds of opportunities. But at the end of the day, yes, you can situate yourself and put yourself in the right positions. but lot of it boils down into luck.
It was luck that I was connected to the right people at the right time. It was luck that I stood next to the right people at the right time. Sometimes it is luck that ends up being why a video of yours pops off and you're able to get a certain number of opportunities. At the end of the day.
A lot of it boils down into luck and sometimes people have this misconceived notion that luck is only for certain kinds of people. It might be for people who look a certain way, , they might act a certain way. A lot of times we might think that it's impossible for us ourselves to be lucky, or to have some kind of Goodwill coming towards us.
But [00:08:00] I am here to say that that's absolutely not true. All of us can be lucky. You just have to situate yourself for it. When I started my own journey into building the career that I wanted, I understood that luck and expanding your surface area for luck, really boiled down into five things for me, and I'm going to be breaking them down for you right now. If you think about it in a pie chart, I feel like each of these five elements occupy 20% because they are incredibly important. The first one to kick it all off that we touched on a little bit plain and simple.
I'm sure you've heard this before, but it is not what you know, it is who, you know, especially if you're building a career in an industry where. Certain people might be able to get you certain job opportunities you might really depend on referrals. It is all about networking and there are so many different ways to network, but one of my favorite books is the defining decade by Meg, Jay. And she talks about the important of leveraging the strength of your weak ties. So the difference between a strong ties and weak ties are strong ties [00:09:00] are your first level connections.
That's your sister. That's your best friend. That's your mom. That's your, professor that you're really close to you, right? It's people who are within your inner circle, who have access to the same experiences and networks and opportunities that you probably do right now. So if you're trying to pave your own way and you're really grinding to the top, but you only have access to the people who have the same opportunities as you. It's going to be pretty difficult to get to where you want to go fast. However, leveraging the strength of your weak ties. Which are people who are second and third level connections, Let's say a professor, you don't talk to as much or a friend of a friend or your parents coworker.
And so on they have access to way different communities, opportunities and experiences, then you and your inner circle have access to. Tapping into that network basically opens up a whole new world for you.
I also will add a little asterisk to this point, because I know that a lot of times when you are a high achiever, it can be very, very, very difficult to ask for help or when you're paving [00:10:00] your own way.
Asking for help and being audacious is a difference between the people who make it and the people who don't. Asking for help. We'll get you where you need to go a lot faster. , I think I read this in the artist's way, which is a 12 week long creative recovery course that I took last year and the author, Julia Cameron said that there is no virtue in a struggling. There is no virtue.
There's no gold medal. There's no prize for trying to climb up a mountain all by yourself, rather than someone helping you. Everyone gets to the finish line at the end. So you might as well ask for help. and also when other people are looking for you to help. Helping them as well.
And an easy way to network and put yourself into all the right positions it's defined free online communities, that fostering environment specifically for networking.
Join clubs, find free events in your city. It use of rent bright and so on. So that's 20% of the pie
the second 20% is self investment. Sometimes you have to pay for the ticket for the event to get to where you need to go. I learned the [00:11:00] importance of self investment so long ago when I was in my six month period where I was really searching for a job and I couldn't find anything. It was at the peak of the pandemic. I invested about $20 into a chorus that will help me learn how to optimize my LinkedIn profile.
And that completely changed the game for me within three weeks after completing the course and integrating everything that I had learned, I landed a new job and it set my life on a completely different course.
Also this past weekend At essence Fest, I met a girl who came to the whole conference alone and ended up having a fantastic time and made amazing connections.
Sullivan investment can look like financial investment. It can mean using all your free time to learn things. It can mean investing in a certain books or courses. Self investment just means pouring back into yourself. Even at the times that you might not want to, but because it feeds and supports the longer term goal.
When I first had the option to go ahead and invest in that course, when I was fresh out of college, fresh out of [00:12:00] my first post-grad job, I did not want to do it it was like someone was physically pulling my card away from me because there wasn't a guarantee for the end results, it wasn't a guarantee that it would even work.
It felt like one of those scams that someone's just made for the you to buy their course online. But at the end of the day, I started to think to myself, this is no more than the cost of lunch. And if I'm not willing to invest that amount of money into my career. Then something's got to change. That's not pointing towards a pretty fruitful future for me.
Think about. The payoff of when it does go well, and think about also what the cost of inaction is. If you don't want to invest your time, or if you have some hesitations towards it, and also think about what subconscious limiting beliefs might be coming up about what good things might happen or how you might life change.
If you do get what you want. I'll a couple of weeks ago. I did it episode called you self-sabotage because you have a subconscious block. Here's how to get over it. Definitely go ahead and give you [00:13:00] an episode of listen, if you haven't already, and it will help you get to the root of your problem and also understand why you might be keeping yourself stuck in that cycle.
That's just not where you want to be.
The next of the pie is. It's utilizing the attention economy. As humans, we have access to more eyeballs than we ever have had before in history. Just through the power of our phones. If you're looking to get lucky, as many people need to see you, and as many people need to be witnesses of your work and know what you're doing as possible, you need to be your loudest advocate and you need to be screaming it from the rooftops.
And the way to do that now is social media. Your social media is your public profile. If I looked at your social media right now, would I be able to tell what you do? Would I be able to tell what you stand for? Or would I be able to tell what you're working towards? Do you have a page dedicated to it? Or maybe it's a sub stack.
Maybe you are a streamer. It could look [00:14:00] like so many different things. But my question to you is, are you using your, the attention economy to put yourself out there and to be visible? Because when you're a Bizible and when you are seen, and you're not keeping yourself hidden from opportunity. That is when the magic starts to happen.
That is when people see you and the right people who need what you are offering are able to come to you. And then maybe when you're pivoting, you're looking for a new job. It can be even as simple as writing LinkedIn posts about your journey, finding a new job and positioning yourself to fit into that industry.
You'd like to be in or into that new position. You got what I'm saying? It's just about putting yourself out there, even though it is so vulnerable to be beginning. And you might think what will other people think about me? What will my parents think about me? What will people from my past think about me.
It can be so daunting, but again, we moved back to that statement of what's the cost of inaction. We see how social media influencers. That industry is worth so much money and [00:15:00] they get so many opportunities. You're quite literally able to 10 X your career at the speed of light just by showing up and being visible. So this is one. I want to say the word currency that you do not want to miss out on the opportunity. Of using this is one part of the 20%.
That is so crucial, just like the other parts, but, you do not want to miss out on the opportunity. To put yourself out there. The best time to start was yesterday. The second best start, time to start is today. Right after you finished listening to this episode.
I just thought of this question that I think that you should ask yourself is who benefits from you? Staying hidden. Or. How do other people benefit from you not being seen? It's a good question to ponder on. I think so.
Cause I'd actually argue. It's the end verse. I don't think as long as you are, well-intentioned in your approach and what you're putting out is helpful to society. No one benefits from you staying hidden.
So think about how there might be ripple effects of you not showing up. [00:16:00] Additionally, we touched on a lot of this in the seven step plan to, um, basically kick-starting the rest of your year. So that way you're accomplishing your new year's goals. It was the last episode that I did.
Go ahead and definitely give it a lesson. When you have time after this episode.
Okay, we've gone through about 60% of the pie and the next 20% is. Getting scrappy. Sometimes, what we have to do is use all the resources that we have available to us and throw everything at the wall to see what sticks.
If you are pivoting into a new industry, sometimes your most recent experience might not be as relevant. But the experience that you had maybe two jobs ago might be the volunteer experience that you had might be, you might have a lot more experience than you recognize.
It just takes understanding how to use your transferable skills to be able to apply them to the next position. The next opportunity, the next project that you are looking for, get as scrappy as possible. And [00:17:00] if you don't have the experience just yet. Use YouTube. YouTube has every thing.
And once again, just commit to being a beginner and get better as you go on.
Okay. And for the last, but equally impactful, equally important part of diversifying your luck portfolio and what this looks like. Is staying. Persistent. It is the people who keep going that are the ones I surpassed. The ones that stopped when things get hard, keep going. I don't know who needs to hear this, or if you felt like giving up, you just need to keep going. If it was easy, everybody would do it.
If it was easy, everyone was succeed on the first try, but it's not easy. And you knew that when you signed up for it,
I've encountered this so many times for things that I have tried and failed at and tried and filled out for what seems like could have been years on end, but eventually it all works out. Eventually, if you keep doing something for long enough, you are going to get the result that you want, but just know that it's not going to happen right off the bat every [00:18:00] single time.
So when it comes to keeping yourself lucky, if you keep networking, if you keep showing up for yourself, you keep posting online. You keep investing in yourself in the courses and you're learning. And you keep getting scrappy. There is no way that you can keep putting in all those efforts.
And then what you have not come to fruition. It will come into fresh in.
One of my all-time favorite quotes is by Oprah Winfrey. And she says I don't believe that there's any such thing as luck. I believe luck is preparation, meeting opportunity. If you hadn't been prepared when the opportunity come, you want to happen. Lucky. I think that there's like a variation of that quote, but you get the gist of it. Luck is preparation meeting opportunity.
When you consistently execute all five of the elements that I just went through with you, you will be lucky. The opportunity will come at the right time. Sometimes opportunities just line up. Sometimes it might feel like things are conspiring in your favor for you to be able to get to your end result. And that will happen.
[00:19:00] You just have to keep going.
That's exactly how I felt when I was able to land that job after six months of being unemployed, because I optimize my LinkedIn profile and I had worked on my resume so that way, when the right opportunity came around, I got quote unquote lucky and I was able to land it.
It's how I felt when I met that media executive in line at culture con and the stars aligned and it led to more opportunities.
It's how I felt at every single step of the way. And I promise you just keep going and executing these steps and you'll end up there too. So. That is all I really had to say for today.
. If you enjoyed the episode, please go ahead and share it with some friends. Put on your Instagram story. Send me a message. If you feel like you are stuck in a lot of ways and you keep self-sabotaging, I have a free PDF that I can send to you.
That's 14 questions to getting to the root cause of what's keeping you in self-sabotage mode. And what subconscious blocks that you might have. All you have to do is go ahead and write me a review. On apple [00:20:00] podcasts. And send me a screenshot at the post-grads playbook. Instagram account, and I will send you that link to go ahead and get it.
So. Thank you so much for tuning in again, and as always, I am rooting for you and I will see you next week. Bye-bye.
